5 Things I am Grateful for this Year

By georgelthomas on 27 Dec 2023 • ( 0 )

Hi everyone! I hope you’re well. Today is Wednesday and, usually, time for the Wednesday Weekly Blogging Challenge from Long and Short Reviews, but the last one for this year was two weeks ago.

So, I decided to take matters into my own hands for these last two weeks.

I say this a lot, but I never thought I’d have the time to write an extra post a week, and I thought I’d struggle and end up skipping the odd one, but I haven’t. In fact, the Wednesday post has given me something extra to focus on, which is helpful if, like me, you have an overactive, over-anxious mind.

Anyway… this week, since we’re in the last week of December, I thought I would look back and take the opportunity to talk about 5 things I have been most grateful for this year.

5 Things I am Grateful for this Year

This year has been a strange one; in many respects, it has been one of the hardest of my life, but even so, there have been some sun spots here and there, breaking up the gloom.

1 Going Back into Recovery for Anorexia and Bulimia
I’ve struggled with eating disorders badly for around five or six years now, and three years ago, I was well on my way to recovery. Then, I hit a bump in the road and relapsed quite hard. I was trying to put off going back into therapy, (wrongly) convinced that ) I could do it alone, but my husband kept pushing me to go back and get help. Boy, am I glad he did? I had lost so much weight that my body had started to cannibalise itself so it could continue to operate at whatever level it could. My kidneys and liver had been struggling, and my bone density was going down, to say nothing of my mental state.
Then came the worry of refeeding syndrome, so I was put on meds to help my body adjust to eating more.

I have worked so hard this year to get better. It’s still a struggle every day, but I am in such a better place now, both physically and mentally, than I was at the beginning of 2023. I am so grateful to my whole medical team (and, of course, my husband) for helping me weather the tough times.

2 Getting to Say Goodbye to My Nanna
This one is bittersweet and also part of the gloom I mentioned above. For a long time, I lived in my own little world where people don’t die. Meanwhile, my nanna was getting sicker and sicker and more frail by the day. I knew she was old (almost 90) and had been ill for a long time, but I couldn’t see how bad she’d become. Even though I could acknowledge that she needed us to do more and more for her, I just kept going on as though she would be around forever.
However, in May, she had to return to the hospital, and though she called me every day (she knew I abhorred hospitals), she very much wanted me to go and see her. On the day I was supposed to go. Our entire household was ill with the stomach flu, so we couldn’t go for a few days. Anyway, about a week later, she called and asked if we were coming to visit. I assured her, “Yes, we’re definitely coming, Nanna.”
By the time we got to the hospital, she was so poorly she could barely lift her hands. She just kept saying, “This isn’t me. I’ve never felt this bad.”

So she rested while my aunty and I chatted to her. She mostly kept her eyes closed, but she was talking to us. Then, when visiting was over, we left, telling her we’d see her later.

When I arrived home, my uncle called and told us we had to get to the hospital fast because she didn’t have much time left. Sadly, when we got there, she had already passed away. My Aunty and I had been the last people to speak with her and hold her hand (she passed about an hour after we left). So, I am immensely grateful for being there when I was. I am glad I got to speak with her. I got to tell her we loved her and hear her tell me she loved me. I didn’t get to talk to either of my parents when they died, so it really means a lot that I was able to be with her in some of her final moments. After all, she has been there for all my big moments, having practically raised us.

3 Finishing Long Languishing Work
Writing is hard at the best of times, never mind when you’re ill. Anorexia takes its toll on your brain, and you develop all these symptoms, like constant brain fog that gradually comes to feel normal. I started writing a short story in 2019 called Polar, and I finished the first draft. But then I couldn’t muster the strength to get it ready. Later on, toward the end of 2021, I started another called Snow Angels, and I didn’t even finish the first draft of that one. I loved those stories so much, but with other writing responsibilities taking priority, I got exhausted just thinking about them.

However, this year, I finally finished them. I drafted, redrafted, edited, polished, and finally, published them. The relief I felt after I released the first one was intense. Once Polar showed up in my Published work on Amazon, I felt incredible. That spurred me on and gave me the impetus to finish Snow Angels.

Other almost-finished stories are sitting in my notebooks, just waiting for me to be strong enough to finish them. Hopefully, if I keep on the way I’m going, I’ll do just that next year.

4 Wednesdays
I am so grateful to Long and Short Reviews for their Wednesday Weekly Blogging Challenge; it kept me writing regularly about stuff other than what I’m working on. It allows me an outlet to talk about myself, which I often find hard to do. Also, the people who take part in that challenge are lovely. Although we only really communicate once a week in the odd comments on one another’s posts, I want you all to know that I’m thankful for you all. Also, you are all remarkably intriguing people.

Now for the last one.

5 All of You!
Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my posts. I work very hard on this website (too hard, I am regularly told), but It’s what I love, and it means so much when other people interact or even just read my words. I am grateful to all of you!

Since this is the last week of 2023 and my latest book review for Friday is already scheduled, I can at least take a few days off to enjoy the rest of the year.

Thanks again, everyone. I mean it.

Until next year! I wish you all a stupendously fabulous 2024. See you then.

George